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The Countryfile

The English Countryside. A place of beauty, where lush green trees run alongside carefully nurtured fields. Where the butterflies frolic with the bees and a river most probably runs through it.

In previous years the odd rifle shot may have been heard, allowing onlookers the rare chance to view a variety of birds and the graceful leaps of the forest deer (who where normally too shy-to-fly / selfishly tending tending to their young). But a true rarity in nature is the Countryfile.

Pronounced 'Kun-tree-vial' and more often than not wearing a hoodie, the Countryfile is by no means related to Pedo, but is often found with a tight luminous pink plumed with gold-bangles-and-slicked-back-hair-in-a-high-ponytail bird, pushing her young around in a buggy.

Most Countryfiles tend to stick to the city streets, where they carefully blend in by avoiding eye-contact. However, every now and again they venture towards greener pastures where remnants of their spoor can be detected...

The Lesser-Charred-Mobile.

The Countryfile is not known for its intelligence, often altering the appearance of their transport, The Lesser-Charred-Mobile (in itself a rare sight).

Blending in with nature


If you're hoping to spot a Countryfile or even a Lesser-Charred-Mobile don't forget to take your sleeping-bag and warm flask of coffee, they tend to be most active at night.


Lucky

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